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Wedding Ceremony Script: Non-Religious and Funny

So, you’re looking for a wedding ceremony script that’s non-religious and funny? You’ve come to the right place! At Simple Marriages, we specialize in making your big day as unique and stress-free as possible, especially when it comes to elopement ceremonies.

Why Choose a Non-Religious and Funny Ceremony?

First things first, why go non-religious and funny? Well, it’s simple. Not everyone wants a traditional ceremony. Some couples prefer a more relaxed, humorous approach. And hey, laughter is the best medicine, right?

“A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.”
— Mignon McLaughlin

The Script

The Opening

“Welcome, everyone, to the wedding of [Bride’s Name] and [Groom’s Name]. We’re not here to solemnize; we’re here to celebrate! So, let’s kick things off with a bang!”

The Vows

“Alright, you two lovebirds, time to make some promises you actually intend to keep!”

  • Bride: “I vow to laugh at all your dad jokes, even when they’re not funny.”
  • Groom: “I vow to never watch the next episode without you, no matter how tempting.”

For more vow ideas, check out our exclusive guide to perfect elopement vows.

The Ring Exchange

“Time to think outside the ring box. You may now exchange your onion rings!”

The Pronouncement

“By the power vested in me by Simple Marriages, and the state of New York, I now pronounce you married! You may now update your Facebook status!”

Tips for a Successful Ceremony

  1. Choose the Right Officiant: Make sure your wedding officiant understands your sense of humor.
  2. Location Matters: Whether it’s Central Park or San Diego, pick a location that resonates with you.
  3. Involve Your Guests: Make it a family-inclusive elopement ceremony.


Your wedding day should be a reflection of who you are as a couple. So why not make it as fun and unique as you are? For more tips and ideas, visit our FAQ or contact us.